A hot subject of argument amongst the sexually prolific bilinguals in Japan is whether you should approach Japanese girls in English or Japanese.
I've attempted it in both languages extensively. For me, it has constantly been much better to approach Japanese women in English. Bear in mind, I am not a typical foreigner so your situation could require a modification of strategy. My reasoning is as follows.
Differentiating Myself and Circumventing Social Expectations
Most Japanese men who approach strange women and attempt to chat them up do a absolutely terrible job of it. It's just not a normal activity in Japanese culture. Therefore, it is important to differentiate yourself from these chumps by using English when you approach a Japanese girl, especially if you look Japanese like I do. Triggering a subconscious response that labels you as a chump is never a good idea.
By simply saying "hello" instead of "sumimasen", I immediately let the girl know that I am not Japanese, thus placing myself in a different category where the cultural expectations of Japanese culture do not apply. I also avoid any negative knee-jerk responses to being hit on in Japanese.
English-speaking asians are also somewhat intriguing to Japanese people due to our relative rarity. That extra bit of intrigue definitely has bought me a couple extra moments to work my charm on multiple occasions. If you're a non-asian, I still recommend using English initially because it will make any Japanese that you drop later in your interaction will be that much more of a welcome surprise.
Quick Filtering and Reliable Responses
Precisely because being approached in English is out of the norm for your average Japanese girl on the street, her reaction to that approach will be more polarized. Some girls will freeze up or run away, others will squeal with delight. Either way, you have a higher chance of eliciting a reaction that even the most socially oblivious simpleton will recognize. Once you get a positive reaction, you can then proceed knowing full well that that girl is buying what you're selling.
More Action, Less Excuses
Waltzing up to women you don't know and initiating conversation can be stressful. And even though my Japanese is near-native level, conversing in English is still much more comfortable for me. To encourage myself to, or rather to prevent discouraging myself from approaching girls, I stick to an ultra-simple set of English phrases.
You don't have to worry too much about the girl not understanding you. English education here is bad, but it's not so bad that they won't know what "hello" means. Use whatever greeting comes naturally to you and see where it takes you.
Conclusion
As with any advice, do not take this as gospel; go out and try it for yourself. Let me know how it works for you. I'd also love to know if this works for bilinguals in other countries.
I've attempted it in both languages extensively. For me, it has constantly been much better to approach Japanese women in English. Bear in mind, I am not a typical foreigner so your situation could require a modification of strategy. My reasoning is as follows.
Differentiating Myself and Circumventing Social Expectations
Most Japanese men who approach strange women and attempt to chat them up do a absolutely terrible job of it. It's just not a normal activity in Japanese culture. Therefore, it is important to differentiate yourself from these chumps by using English when you approach a Japanese girl, especially if you look Japanese like I do. Triggering a subconscious response that labels you as a chump is never a good idea.
By simply saying "hello" instead of "sumimasen", I immediately let the girl know that I am not Japanese, thus placing myself in a different category where the cultural expectations of Japanese culture do not apply. I also avoid any negative knee-jerk responses to being hit on in Japanese.
English-speaking asians are also somewhat intriguing to Japanese people due to our relative rarity. That extra bit of intrigue definitely has bought me a couple extra moments to work my charm on multiple occasions. If you're a non-asian, I still recommend using English initially because it will make any Japanese that you drop later in your interaction will be that much more of a welcome surprise.
Quick Filtering and Reliable Responses
Precisely because being approached in English is out of the norm for your average Japanese girl on the street, her reaction to that approach will be more polarized. Some girls will freeze up or run away, others will squeal with delight. Either way, you have a higher chance of eliciting a reaction that even the most socially oblivious simpleton will recognize. Once you get a positive reaction, you can then proceed knowing full well that that girl is buying what you're selling.
More Action, Less Excuses
Waltzing up to women you don't know and initiating conversation can be stressful. And even though my Japanese is near-native level, conversing in English is still much more comfortable for me. To encourage myself to, or rather to prevent discouraging myself from approaching girls, I stick to an ultra-simple set of English phrases.
You don't have to worry too much about the girl not understanding you. English education here is bad, but it's not so bad that they won't know what "hello" means. Use whatever greeting comes naturally to you and see where it takes you.
Conclusion
As with any advice, do not take this as gospel; go out and try it for yourself. Let me know how it works for you. I'd also love to know if this works for bilinguals in other countries.
About the Author:
Girls in Tokyo can be tricky. They certainly were to me, and I'm Japanese-American. Fortunately, I figured out how to lead a life of romantic abundance in the land of the rising sun. Learn everything I wish I'd known back when I was a college graduate on my blog about getting girls in Tokyo.
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